this place is like a tomb

Apologies, apologies, apologies. I have been drawing, I just haven’t been updating. Lots of things in the pipeline, though…. watch this space.

Happy Christmas

What you’ll needSome thin card, scissors, paper glue and a printer. And maybe an adult to help. Step onePrint out the image below, and glue it onto the thin card. Step twoOnce the glue has dried, use your scissors and cut along the dotted lines. Now, being very careful, cut out the two blue circles. Step threeTake the piece you have cut out, and fold it in two. This is the main part of your card. Step fourNow add a greeting. Print out the image below and cut along the dotted lines. Step fiveTake the main part of your card, so the inside is facing you, and glue the message onto its right hand side. Step sixPut your fingers through the holes, and give Father Christmas a pair of dancing legs! And there you go. Happy Christmas from me to you. Have a great...

ruff and ready

During the Renaissance, the fashion for wearing enormous ruffs meant that longer spoons had to be produced (another pic for an upcoming...

junior führer

For an upcoming book; and a piece about ‘Names you would no longer consider calling your...

*tumbleweed*

Crikey, it’s quiet on here. I’ve a few bits and bobs on the go at the moment, and will post bits in due course (mainly, I’m working on a new book for Rough Guides). In the meantime – remember the Damo Suzuki poster in the last post? Well, it’s got the Leeds Music Scene forum a-harumphin’ and a-squabblin’ over whether you can read the bloody writing on it or not (and let’s be honest – you can’t. Not...

it's Hergé's world, we just live in it

Jean-Pierre Gougeau’s blog – with reproductions of bits and bobs from the Tintin stories – is great. EDIT: Gah! The blog disappeared! Who knows why, but I’ll leave the link active in case it...

three old drawings

Jim from The Royle Family (christ, look at those poorly drawn legs) and a couple of others from about -ooh, 10 years ago? Something like that anyway. (All found between the pages of a long-unopened...

actual sarandon single

Happy 2009!Here’s the Sarandon single I did the artwork for way back when. It came out just before Christmas, and should you want to get your hot little hands on one, try Rough Trade (and othere reputable record...

happy christmas from me to you

Foolishly, I may have forgotten to send you a Christmas card this year. But fear not, as by following the steps below – you can make your own! All you’ll need is some thin card, some paper glue, a printer and some scissors (be careful). Step one Print out the image below and glue it onto some thin card. Step two Once the glue has dried, use your scissors and cut along the dotted lines (you may want to ask an adult to help you). Step three Take the piece you have cut out, and fold it in two. This is the main part of your ‘card’. Step four Now add a greeting. Print out the image below and cut along the dotted lines. Step five Take the main part of your card, so the inside is facing you, and glue the message onto its right hand side. Step sixStand your finished card upright and – Hey presto; a Christmas message from me to you. Have a wonderful...

soldier

I found this sorting through some old discs. I can’t remember what it was for exactly (it was for some back-room sized record label or something) and this was a rough idea. Actually, I don’t think the job got past the ‘rough ideas’ stage. It’s from two or three years ago, I...

blah blah

I was in the Gunmakers, in Clerkenwell, last Wednesday – waiting for Ant and trying to block out the drone from the next table. An Italian woman was listening intently to her English friend bang on and on. The topics covered included; how great the English woman was at accents; how the English woman was from a posh part of the country but could hold her own in East London; how the English woman should really be an actress. There were other topics, too, and I’m sure you can guess them.Anyway; rather than suppress the urge to shout ‘shut up!’ at the top of my lungs, I tried to draw the Italian woman in my sketchbook without getting rumbled. (Apologies for the swear, mum, if you’re reading...

big train

This sketch is from the second series of Big Train. I did the caricatures that Kevin Eldon’s ‘drawing’ in it, back when I was – I dunno – 25 or something. I remember how when the coffee-stained piece of A4 with the script on was biked over, my flatmate looked at it and said ‘that doesn’t sound very funny’. I can only look at the drawings through my fingers, now; they make me cringe so much. Given a second chance I’d do a much, much better job but hey – they only gave me half an hour or so to get them done, and they never actually paid me in the end. So I guess we’re quits. (Thanks to Rhodri for ripping it from the...

Hergé, Goscinny et Uderzo

Sometimes I actually love youtube.Here’s a reason why: A 1969 interview from French television, where (in a group with other bande dessinée authors) Hergé, Goscinny and Uderzo compare their most famous creations*. Click the bottom right of the screen, then the red ‘cc’ icon, if you want to turn the English subtitles on (…and then do what I did, and trawl through the rest of quiestce88’s youtube channel). *For anyone about to ask that question – I prefer Tintin. And also for the record, I’m a...

me looking at people looking at francis bacon at the tate britain

I thought the exhibition was very good (with a really comprehensive range of Bacon’s paintings) but it was extremely busy; and I often found myself jostling for position with people trying to take in the ‘loneliness and solitude’ of the work. Still – I’d recommend it. And you’ll see i bought a ‘joint’ ticket – I went to the Turner Prize too. It left me very cold, I’m afraid. Finally; news for anyone reading this stateside; there’s a drawing of mine in the next issue of Bust. I’ll post it on here once I get the...

crumb transcript

Thanks to Mike, who had held onto a transcript of some of that Crumb interview I was telling you about, and who saved me having to find the tape and type it all out. It’s more interesting than the finished article, I reckon, and gives you more of an idea of what kind of guy Crumb is/was (it also gives you more of an idea of how green I was to all this). So, here goes. It was done onstage at the ICA, straight after a performance by Crumb’s band. It wasn’t complete, anyway, and I’ve cut a slither from the beginning, as that was very much about the band and not as interesting, I don’t think (general gist: French music is good). Anyway, this blog’s supposed to be about cartooning. Robert Crumb, 3rd April 1999. Elliot: How does your love of music manifest itself in your work?Crumb: It’s an indirect thing. I don’t know, I try not to analyse it. But I love my music and I listen to it every day, y’know. Get out one of my old 78’s and go through the old ritual. I love laying on the needle, turning it on, sit down, listen, get up, put it away, get out another; I love it. It’s very important to me.E: The way you come across in the stuff written about you, and also your work…C: A real crank, I know.E: That’s not what I’m getting at…C: I am. I hate most stuff. Rock and roll, computers. I’m a real nightmare.E: Is there anything modern that interests you?C: Girls. All these modern girls have great...

Ray Lowry, RIP

Bugger. Ray Lowry’s died.My favourite cartoon* of his goes like so: A group of klansmen march on from stage left, only to be met by a group of Nazis – who scoff at them; saying ‘oh look – pointy headed liberals’. *I shall find it, and scan...

crumb

We’re sorting out the flat at the moment, boxing things up and moving them around so new flooring can be put in. During the tumult, I found the June 1999 copy of SLEAZENATION magazine – one of those postmodern, Hoxton-based London rags that Charlie Brooker ended up satirising with Nathan Barley. My friend Jenny was assistant editor at the time, and earlier that year, she called up and asked if I’d like to go along to the ICA and interview Robert Crumb. As you can imagine, I jumped at the chance. He was in London promoting his part of the ‘EMI Songbook Series’ – compilation CDs put together by various ‘left-field’ artists. Also at the ICA, I met Gilbert Shelton and Ralph Steadman – both of who drew a picture in my notebook (Steadman drew Nixon, Shelton drew Fat Freddy’s Cat and waxed lyrical about how beautiful London’s architecture was). It still galls me that I lost the notebook later that night, my 24 year-old brain fried by all the free tequila on offer. Anyway – Below is the piece as it appeared. Of course there are a few mistakes here and there (Crumb never submitted ‘Fritz the Cat’ to MAD, for example) but I think it’s fair to chalk half of those up to the judicious sub-editor, and the other half to me (not the dig at comic shops at the end, mind, that was them). Fans won’t find anything new in it, I’m afraid. I’ve a cassette recording of the whole interview somewhere, which is leagues longer and more involved. If I ever find it, I may...

earth wind and fire

This shop hilariously shares the same name as 70’s soul sensations Earth Wind and Fire. In what seemed like a good idea at the time, my friend Darren and I decided to compile such occurrences on this flickr site. Now, be warned – only those willing to accept the most tenuous of connections (as well as those with a working knowledge of vaguely obscure rap acts) may wish to take a...

grifter

Here’s an ‘old’ one… … by which I mean ‘I did it ages ago, but it’s only just come out’.Grifter are a band from Plymouth. They make that kind of balls-out rock (I think that needed to be in bold) that’s influenced by Black Sabbath, Scissorfight and Clutch. My mate Phil plays bass for them -and at the end of 2006(!), he asked if I’d draw a picture for the cover of the band’s new CD. I said yes, Phil. I’ll draw you a picture if you like.That new CD finally got a release (of sorts) a month or so ago. In this interview, Ollie from the band explains the delay, and also mentions the cover and how the character I drew has been adopted as the band’s mascot. Be warned though, he does a...

modern classics

Amazing what you can find in charity shops if you look. I found a load of books, you see. Books that I could have sworn blind had only been published in recent years. Take this, for example – a first edition paperback of Jeremy Clarkson’s compendium of tedious opinions, ‘Born To Be Riled’. From 1963, no less. Sometimes, I just can’t believe my eyes luck. Here’s two more...

sleeping on the job

It’s been a bit quiet round here recently. Apologies. I’ve been up to bits and bobs here and there, but it’s either unfinished or not quite ready for you guys to...

darth trumpet

piumini moncler outletSee that? That’s one of the spot illustrations from Rhodri Marsden’s upcoming book for Rough Guides. The book’s called ‘FWD This Link – A rough guide to staying amused online when you should be working’, and it’ll be in the shops come October 1st (the drawing’s for a piece in the book about a ‘Star Wars Trumpet Solo’, in case you’re wondering). Of course, October 1st is over a month away so, while you’re waiting, you can keep yourself amused with the book’s related blog, which is...

plan b

There’s a picture of mine in the latest issue of Plan B.maglie calcio poco prezzoThey printed it bigger than I expected, and now I wish I’d spent more time adding details (not that it’s their fault; I was on a ‘simplicity’ kick at the time and I feel I over – or is that ‘under’? -did it). But ho-hum … another something to add to my ‘do better next time’ list. If you can’t make it out from the photo, the pic’s over on my flickr account,...

last laugh

magliette calcio a poco prezzoIt’s rough and ready, and very much a ‘first go’, but I enjoyed this. It took me back to my days drawing comics with Jim et...

two people

Looking a bit grumpy on the way to London Bridge. 9.20am-ish. 31st July. Reading Tolstoy, and also on the way to London Bridge. 9.30am-ish. 31st July. maglia ac...

quentin blake

maglia bayern monacoI’m stopping with just the one example, or I’ll never stop. And I’d write about why I love Quentin Blake’s drawings – how alive they are, how packed with energy and character, and… but I’d never stop then,...

other people’s records

Here’s my artwork* for Sarandon‘s new single, out on the Little Car label some time in the near future. It’s cracking stuff (I mean the record, not my drawing) – all itchy, scratchy hyperactive guitar riffs and, on the b-side, a caffeined cover of the Swell Maps’ ‘Vertical Slum’. I recommend all readers buy a copy, if only for the sheer beauty of the packaging, eh what. maglia chelsea*not all on my own, mind you. I had a bit of design help here and there, from both Sheran and Crayola. Thank-yuh, kindly,...

kings cross station. 17th July, 2008.

Woman rushing for the train on platform 8. Around 6.45pm. And this chap wasn’t necessarily using public transport, but I had to include him. He was dressed in a knackered old white suit, a white fur coat (slung over his shoulders) and carrying three white leather handbags, which were crammed full with all his worldly posessions. He’d finished off the outfit with a blood-red tie and was standing, stock-still, outside WH...

grace jones’ pre-concert film

You see that? That’s Grace Jones’ huge bendy head. Last month, she played at the Royal Festival Hall in London, for a one-off show and I’m really glad I went. And before appeared in the flesh, a filmed version of Grace (huge, warped, massive) flickered on above the stage and started singing her forthcoming single. Pretty impressive, too, even if it wasn’t a mile away from one of those ‘effects’ you get on apple mac webcams. Anyway – more bands should do intro-films (much like Devo do). There’s my two-penneth. maglie calcio poco prezzo You can read a review of Grace’s gig here, if you like. Edit (October 2008) – Turns out the film we watched his the video to her ‘comeback’ single – Corporate...